about love

happy end

2010-10-05T23:33:00.000+07:00

calming my heartbeat
your voice is so soft
your touch is warm
it decreasing an anger in me

start from unconsciousness
climbing to high mountain of fear
many years I must survive
to find you

finally I touch your lips again
finally I hold your hands
like years ago

Running like a storm,
flying like a jet plane,
I almost forget all tears
...........................now I believe tomorow is ours.

The time

2010-01-30T06:13:00.000+07:00

It's time to think
it's time to learn
it's time to ask myself

Not a train nor a poison will heal your headache
I've ask you to come home
I've searching almost around the world
get back, come back to me...

This is a morning
two mornings I wake up lonely
feels like a thousand years
I grasp a loneliness, drink my tears every night

I understand I've walk in a fragile land
I understand you are not kind of a man I've been looking for

This is a start to think about you, about me, about us
I'll try
my firs step again
this is the time

If

2010-01-17T03:19:00.000+07:00

If the world without gravitation
we will live in a light
If the world without clouds
I'll catch your hands

seems to me
I'm laying in a glass
shaking my hand
slowly
powerless

want to touch you now
and take you home
just for us
nights and days
no one else

If there is no any time
if there is no any distance
between us

Oh, Love!!
Don't pick up my wings

The evening search

2009-11-15T21:45:00.003+07:00

Finally I found you.
Time goes and almost fade your smile away. My concern is about keeping us together. It's a dream but it is a reality. I hold you. In my arm today. I kiss you in every step we get. I promise I will never let you go.
It was rain and road was crowded. I cried out loud to called out your name. again ang again. Every body looked at me. Perhaps I looked like an insane woman. Oh,I don't care. My heart beat so strong as I saw a big-big fire. Black hazard. Where are you?
Finally I found you.
Then I closed the door I don't wanna any one else to take away you from me. You bring a full bag of candies. I hold you I cry. Don,t go away from me, don't let me loosing you. You know you are my reason to stay alive. In this unhappy world.
Who have attracted you to go the time I ask you home? Who asked you to away from me the time I knew it is not good for you to go outdoor?
In the middle of crowded I asked to everyone. I asked until my eyes tears, I walked until mu toe ache.
My baby, don't let me jump in this situation. This evening I sad but then I am happy.

finding curtain of love

2009-11-01T00:03:00.002+07:00

It's been along time I lay in this empty bed.
no roses
no kisses
only a smile but it kidnaped by the breeze
how can I survive?

Why don't you call me for awhile
to say goodnight
or just say hello
for my almost droop love
inside me

.................
where does your heart go?
do you still bring your love to me?
is there any?

Only raindrops
answer me

you said you have not changed yet
but your act speak it loud

2009-10-25T02:45:00.002+07:00

oh,love........................

candle wait

2009-10-25T02:38:00.002+07:00

It was only me who's dreaming. Waiting for you, your call or even only your messages. Two words, magical words never out from you. Until the day was over. See? My candle waiting for you. It was a waiting moment, a meaningful to me. And you shocked me with your unappearance. All fade, all fade suddenly,.... How can you do this to me?

castle of heart

2009-09-25T14:12:00.003+07:00

Minutes stop
How can this sound calling me still?
I know how hard to prepare
I know how it feel

This castle mean so much for us
only us know where
only us can touch

we color it with heart
we build it with tears and sweat
we decorated it with passion, love,and understanding
you and me
from our different world

And suddenly it stop
As wind blows strong
take our castle to rock
Give me your song! give your song!

Minute stop
I only find your tears drop

2009-08-20T23:44:00.002+07:00

You can catch me in the middle of lonesome. So unsure about myself. Feel mislead, feel so discomfort. How can I run from this mess. I want to take your hand just to lay my sorrow down. I want to look into your eyes to make me calm. I want to kiss your lips to make me strong enough. I want to,...I want to,...
But the moment is over now.
How can I make up the sun to send you its warmth for you to come to me? I've been dreaming so long. I will coup it to reality. Someday, somewhere.

day of emptynes

2009-08-18T07:09:00.004+07:00

I wake up. Oh, I pass yesterday. But I've not overcome my feeling. I remember how I prepared for yesterday. I remember how I counted times. To get you. To touch you. It's a long long road to reach the moment. I want you to know how so meaningful that time to me. I"ve dreamed it for nights.
And I understand finally. Now I console my heart. But my eyes not willing to stop shed it tears.
Along my way home I found my heart ache. O, felt like something withhold you from my touch.... Seems like fate get its step in my front, try to foist me!
I hope I never been there. I hope I never aggrieved. I used no to be like this before. How can I say? It just an empty day. No more.

August

2009-08-16T21:48:00.004+07:00

it's about life. yours and mine. every one's. Don't throw your life to the wall, Dear. Don't let any one steal your dreams. It is your own life, your own future. Mine is yours and yours is mine. Simple thing. We need no fight to get one.

2009-06-06T17:10:00.000+07:00

So,
please hold me and never let me go

keep us one

2009-06-01T00:09:00.002+07:00

your eyes talk too much.it's enough for me.you care is as wide as the sky.i can't run away from your touch. because i know i always need you. because you know i can't live without your love.and only us know why.this secret love is meaningful.swan and deer.sand and rainbow.or whatever they said.all i knew is you and me.whoever we are we have love to keep us one.

lost in world

2009-04-26T13:26:00.002+07:00

calling You from distance
it was me
who made a distance

You saw me cry
after all he said
You let me walked out
run from You
so far

I know
I never away from You
I blind myself from Your beautiful smile
I deaf myself from Your words
I numb myself from Your loving touch
I,..
I,..
never felt a love as great as Yours

how can I say?
I love You but asking You why
I'm Yours but asking You
: do You really exist?

political love?

2009-04-17T18:34:00.003+07:00

politic, a cruel srategyc sometimes
politic, always bring a mask
politic, my dear..
a tool to help people, too

never give up for this love
never give up for this live

i swear
i will never give up for you.

really heaven

2009-04-11T20:26:00.000+07:00

we discuse about heaven
is there any?
you ask me about my God
how about yours?
is your God is mine? is it the same?

i feel your smile, dry
i touch your eyes, wet

it is about live and death
it is about you and me

But,....
i find heaven
is here
as we are one
you and me
there's no heaven like this

2009-04-05T18:31:00.000+07:00

thousand years go by
fly
now empty
in me
as I look at your eyes

dessert me
cool, freeze,lonely
but dry
I am

backward to veil,...
ten eggs now become dandelion
wing to moon

me and you

2009-03-30T23:51:00.000+07:00

fly to the moon, we've discused
taking world in our finger tip, we've imagine
coloring days
kissing sun shine
blowing all emptiness

each word we spell
growing
each moment we shared
bloom

never will stop, u said
never will die, I swear
me, you.
forever

2008-11-22T16:12:00.000+07:00

keep you in my arms
kising you forever
let the world with their own brain
we keep silent
but in warmth
sun smilling
moon shy
''''''''''''''''''''
love,
we catch in palm

tears in your palm

2008-08-12T16:27:00.000+07:00

wake up, I run lonely
wake up, and turn on light
in your heart
to this dark, silent and frozen road
wake up, Sun
wake up!!

Night was so cruel
Night was so pale
I told to myself
this must be a bitter world
wake up, wake up!!
all farmers almost die
they cry on and on
oh, Life : tears in your palm.....

love you all

2008-07-16T16:58:00.000+07:00

water,soil,air,fire,sun,cloud,rain,light,storm,...oase and everything.
Meet u at the top, meet u as u down.
Always. Your eyes shinning.
Bright.
"Part of nature itself", u said.
And flow.
Like water.
It's life.
my life, your life.
Past, today , future.
We walk.
Never be alone.
I love u. All.
"That's all", u said

waiting

2008-03-17T01:51:00.000+07:00

I am laying alone. Your smile so close to me. Close enough to touch,...but it fade away. Scene by scene walking in my mind. Time we shared, time we in love.
Can't cry hard enough now.
only tears,....they talk too much
but not enough for me
my heart taste its own sorrow
......oh, feeling so unsure.....
are you still there, Love?

silence

2008-03-09T23:55:00.000+07:00

I am a silent
frozen
lonely
wind
blowing in your dark night
entrance to your calm heart
as u open it

so let me lay on your warm soul
and share lonelines
emptines
get it into our happines

i love you

2008-02-25T04:34:00.001+07:00

never hate u

2008-02-24T13:58:00.000+07:00

it said that love is only skin deep
then u'll find hate
Or me who never seen the truth
keep taking something gonna change?
hate u: will never on my mind
at all
after all

i love you

2008-02-17T20:03:00.000+07:00

don't ask me why
don't ask me how
don't ask me what

i love you
that's all the answer

2008-02-17T17:44:00.000+07:00

it's a grace to hold u
in my arms
kissing your smile
spend hundrets minutes
with you

as wind blows fast
my heart beats strong
and warm
inside me

you and i
only two of us
understand
what kind of scene it be

nafas cintaku

2007-12-28T23:03:00.000+07:00

:ketidakberdayaan memelukku
erat,
teramat erat

kusadari
betapa harus menanti
sisa waktumu
sisa letihm
sisa hatimu
kau jatuhkan di ujung rinduku

kupungut satu satu
kutaburkan di sudut hati
yang beku
hampir layu

.........
beginikah?
nafas cintaku

utopia

2007-12-27T07:42:00.000+07:00

and we start to step
on a cloudy road
let our love light away
keep taking my hands, Sweetheart

:the truth is
I want to have u
all of u
only for me
but,
there’s something I can’t shake
someone else
beside u
spent her life for long time with u

this is my first time
love someone
in an impossible case
and for my first time
I want to do something I called sin
:spending a cup of night with u

only if u happy
only if it good for u
surely,
I’ll be happy, too
looking at u from a far
loving u from outside
no matter what happen to me

i love u

2007-12-23T22:10:00.000+07:00

finally i got the answer
finally i find it myself
i love u
yes, i love u
but road is not smooth and clear
my love,
if we keep walking
we should closely standing
because we don't have any map
this new country still dark and pale
play your hand
and colour all street we find
then we'll have a world
a world that shinning hope for u and me
its a worth living world.

after all

2007-12-20T00:40:00.001+07:00

deburan ombak itu menghampiriku
riak kecilnya buatku gemetaran

kenapa kau datang
setelah sekian puluh ribu hari kumencari?
setelah hari tak lagi pagi
setelah terlalu banyak peristiwa
karena sauh dilabuhkan
- dengan paksa

inikah permainan hidup?
barangkali aku pun bukan satu-satunya
: madu yang menetes di langit-langitku
milik siapakah?
terlalu manis untuk dibagi! terlalu nikmat!
apakah aku telah merebutnya?
atau,...
perangkap laba-labakah ini?
(oh, betapa teganya aku menduga)

wahai, kehidupan
ke manakah arah angin akan melaju?

2007-12-17T23:24:00.000+07:00

sayapku hampir patah, Bella
dan kau genggam aku
tak tahu ke mana arah angin
ku tetap ingin gapai cakrawala
buatmu
masih,...

bagimu
selalu akan ada

because you give me reason to live

tujuh rembulan

2007-12-08T23:48:00.000+07:00

sepi ini menyergapku
sedikit nyeri
:tak mengapa

Kau kah itu yang melambaikan tangan
berbalut kecupan fajar yang merekah
menyerbakkan kening hari yang dingin?

tujuh rembulan di langit tadi malam
kuhitung satu satu
dan bintang bersinar amat terang

kumerindukan hembusan angin lembut pada daun gerisik
ah,..
hanya tetes air hujan

bila saja
engkau ada di sini
rembulan itu buatmu dan aku

freedom

2007-12-06T12:06:00.001+07:00

I dream about us
I dream about the sun
I dream about the land
......................
......................
I dream about freedom

Oh, freedom...
what does it taste?
What does it feel?
is it nice?
is it sweet?

I wonder if only you could understand
this world is not enough
these are not worth enough
for us

find a new one
or we start to make it!

the next

2007-10-18T17:09:00.000+07:00

THIS IS NOT LOVE

sometimes I see your face
flying above that corridor
sometimes I see you walking
across my room , smiling
sometimes my heart beats so strong
remember you

so many times I whispered
so many times I wrote on sky
so many times I sang
... “ miss you so”…

then we spend minutes
days
years,…
oh, only on my mind!

I know it worth enough to spend whole life with you
preparing our book of future
and world so safe and comfort suddenly

with you, only with you
I am willing to touch eternity
( see? and I am counting minutes before we meet, there)

They tell me that I ‘m so, so blind
miss you like this.
(Is this love? Perhaps this is love. No, no, this is not love. It just a glance of a lonesome feeling. Sometimes.)

Hari masih muda ketika kuangkat seorang bocah dengan tangisan yang hampir tak terdengar dan tanpa air mata. Tak ada kata-kata yang bisa mewakili perasaanku saat itu. Hanya sesak di dada. Bagaimana kubisa berkata negeri ini subur dan makmur? Kaki-kaki yang lemas, badan yang tergolek dan hanya terbungkus tulang itu bercerita lebih dari ribuan kata. Di depanmu sawah terbentang luas, Bocah. Dan kau belum pernah berhasil menapakinya dengan kakimu meski usiamu telah lebih sepuluh kali umur jagung di ladangmu Ke manakah sari air susu ibumu? Kemanakah dibawa hasil panen ayahmu? Sekiranya engkau bisa kubawa, sekiranya aku berhak untuk melakukan apa saja untukmu, sekiranya,…. Dan mereka yang berhak atasmu telah berkata ‘tidak’ padaku, pada kami.
Atau kah terlalu alergi pada warna bajuku yang acapkali disandang orang dalam kemunafikan? Tak bolehkah ada hati yang tulus memakainya? Kau tahu, bocah. Kadang aku kelelahan melawan arus yang deras itu. Seolah membawa lilin dalam badai. Teramat berat. Tidakkah kau ingin menggantikanku kelak? Dengan hati yang sama? Aku mengenal kakakmu yang penuh semangat, keluar dari segala jerat. Seperti elang yang gagah. Tiakkah kau ingin mengepakkan sayapmu bersamanya?

Bocah,… Kamu benar-benar seperti anak ayam kelaparan dalam lumbung beras. Seandainya, ya seandainya…

SPRAINED

every time we met
I listened to each word you said
as a santri to his kiai
as a little girl to her grandpa
although I did not understand what you were talking abaout
although you did not know what I was thinking about
although we did not understand a word we were each saying
we could enjoy the silent discussion
then get a deal
yap, our only language was unspoken
: it was love. A strange love, exactly!

beloved

2007-10-18T16:05:00.000+07:00

don't ever listen
to anyone who said I never care
don't ever think
you will mislead

can't you see
you've been my guiding angel
only if you know
only if you understand
you give me reason to live
-at second I looked at you

sweet baby

2007-10-16T17:48:00.000+07:00

hear your voice:crying
look at your face:crying
so beautiful
so powerful
welcome to this old,old world
how about your journey
have you ever here before?

everyone came to this place with nothing to brought
next,
they will leave this place without anything to bring, too
so what are you looking for
money?
famous?
knowledge?
power?
will it be enough for you?
at one step you will understand
there will be nothing

............................
everything is nothing if you don't have love
inside your heart
welcome, Newborn.

difficult love

2007-10-08T00:54:00.000+07:00

a glass of water perhaps enough
pour it into a landscape
I see a flame, hot flame
burning from your heart

it's clear to see
even a fool need no time to guess
as I paint a yellow and red
you scream out loud
- wihtout any sound!
:a tear falling
your eyes,...your eyes
they talk so much

I'll gonna find out
this pallet of your life
take me ride to your love
I know I'll never give up to you
I know I'll never stop

a glass of water
perhaps not enough for me
to subside the fear in me
How can I stop that flame from your heart?

Janvier

2007-10-08T00:25:00.000+07:00

Janvier comes to me
brings some flowers
and sends a smile, a pale one

Janvier comes to me
touches my hair and runs away
just like before.
again and again

Janvier, my friend.
a lamb.
cover her heart of loneliness
with a smile, a pale one

Janvier, please come back
I know what you are looking for:
Love.
I give it to you.
as much as you ask.